This post is for those that are falling in love, or perhaps, you are (already) in love.

I was once told that before we are born, each soul has been matched with another soul, and that it is up to us to find our soul mate in life. And if we do, we will find our “true love” (read my blog on How Would I Know True Love). The phrase, “I love you” is used so casually. We say that we are in love, but do we know what being in love really mean?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, here are a few definitions of the word, “love.”

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/in%20love

a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties <maternal love for a child> (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests <love for his old schoolmates> b : an assurance of love <give her my love>

2

: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion <love of the sea>

3

a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration <baseball was his first love> b (1) : a beloved person : darling —often used as a term of endearment (2) British —used as an informal term of address

4

a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others

Webster leaves much to our own interpretation. To me, when I say I am in love with someone, I want to spend the rest of my living life with this person. You love this person, and this person loves you for who you really are. Not simply because you are attractive, or wealthy, or brilliant. They love you because you are YOU. No need to pretend or hide the things that make up who you really are. Be yourself and they should be themself.

Take things slow and really get to know each other. Your “rest of your life” can be a very long time, and if you don’t really know each other, how do you know that you are truly in love? Sometimes a friendship turns into love, other times it does not, but I believe friendship is where it all starts. If you read my blog, How Would I Know True Love, I indicated that true love cannot be one-sided. When I was young, everything I wanted was superficial. I wanted the perfect 10! And perhaps, I strived to be perceived as the perfect 10 in someone else’s eyes. You cannot find true love by ranking others or ranking yourself. Everyone is unique in their own special ways. Start by knowing yourself then learn to know each other better than yourself, and if you still believe that you have true love, then perhaps you found it.

I have a post titled, What Defines Greatness. One of my hero is Bruce Lee. Many know Lee as a Martial Artist and Action Film Star, but he was also a student of philosophy.

A quote from Bruce Lee on the subject of “love”.

The happiness that is derived from excitement is like a brilliant fire — soon it will go out. Before we married, we never had the chance to go out to nightclubs. We only spent our nights watching TV and chatting. Many young couples live a very exciting life when they are in love. So, when they marry, and their lives are reduced to calmness and dullness, they will feel impatient and will drink the bitter cup of a sad marriage.

Take things slow, get to really know each other, learn what really matters, and if your souls bond, then perhaps you have found true love.

If this post has inspired you, please leave a comment. Let others know, when you know you are “in love“.

We get a second puppy. The puppy chews on furniture, jumps on people, makes a mess, and destroys everything in the house. We scold and punish the puppy, and it works temporarily but it goes back to doing the same thing that puppies do. In time, the puppy grows into a dog and the old habits begin to test our patience. Soon we neglect it and give it little attention. In time the grown dog finds no reason to stay and decides to never return.

We get our third puppy. This time, we learn that it must be taught and trained when it is still young. We show it love and affection, but we also teach it not to do the things it should not do. Training requires much time, patience and disciplinary love. The puppy grows into a loyal, obedient, behaving and loving dog; that we we can grow old with.

People and puppies is like the beginnings of a relationship. We treat our first love like our first puppy. Infatuated at first, but tiresome over time. In our second attempt, we believe that we have learned the lessons from the first, but soon our patience run out and so does our love. In our third attempt, we finally learned what is important to maintain a lasting and healthy relationship.

Your puppy won’t be a puppy forever. Teach it well while the relationship is still young and both of you will have a much happier future.

Read this post On Being In Love.

On Friday, March 11, 2011, Japan was struck by a magnitude 9.0 earthquake causing death toll in the thousands (perhaps above ten thousand); destroyed homes, towns and livelihoods. Aftershocks above magnitude 6.0, an escalating radiation-leak crisis from damaged nuclear reactors, and fears of additional tsunamis from aftershocks continue to test the Japanese spirit.

The Japanese people have a long history of enduring many trials of hardships, and they come back stronger than ever. As we reflect on the survival of the human species (the first Eve and Adam), their strength, courage, determination and spirit to survive lives in all of us. It is in this spirit that I know the Japanese people will overcome this terrible strategy and look towards building a brighter future. The human spirit continues to be strong, and the Japanese people are an exemplary example of that human spirit.

Our hearts and prayers to the citizens and residents of Japan during these trying days, weeks, months and years ahead. May God bless Japan.

Japan earthquake: How to help

Show your support and write a prayer for the Japanese victims in the comments.

I have a different meaning for “just enough”. This is my equation:

“Just Enough” = “Balance” + Weighing your “Opportunity Cost”

To achieve balance, sometimes we slightly overdo AND other times slightly underdo in order to find equilibrium (the most desired yet practical result within our potential). Many of us caution on error and we tend to overdo, except rather than overdoing just enough, we overdo too much. A lot of us waste valuable time overdoing the unnecessary. In the other extreme, we set our bar so low that we are not even challenged, and therefore not doing within our potential. So to achieve balance, we will sometimes do slightly more and other times slightly less, and then the balancing process repeats itself. We are constantly out of balance and it’s our job to continually find balance.

Opportunity Cost is a business term for calculating the cost of selecting one opportunity over another opportunity. When we spend time attending a class, our opportunity cost is not doing something else such as making money, having fun, exercising, getting rest, or perhaps taking a different class. When we spend eight hours at work each day, our opportunity cost is what we could be doing with that time. So we might compare our opportunity cost to getting paid while spending eight hours at work vs. not getting paid doing something else. Rather than thinking in terms of “black and white”, let’s consider the possibility of spending eight hours at a dead end job vs. spending half of that time doing something you enjoy that has the potential to pay you much more later. The point of calculating opportunity costs is to help you compare the value of one thing over something else so that you don’t end up spending the same amount of time (or money) doing both, and not achieving your desired results that is within your potential.

Take the below table for example. If you were a student with the following time constraint, which scenario would you rather choose (1, 2 or 3)?

Some might choose scenario 2, but then if we are required to pass subject B in order to graduate, we will waste time having to retake subject B again. A lot of people confuse the reason for being in school. We think it’s about getting the highest Grade Point Average (GPA), so we drop the class that would produce a lesser desired result and retake it later; hence wasting time (read my blog about the value of time – If you could live forever, what would you value the most). Some institutions will lead us to believe this. I think school’s purpose should be about learning and discovering yourself (what you like/dislike, what you are better at/not as good at, how you like to learn). The diploma tells employers that you graduated, have a capacity to learn, and have the perseverance to finish something; that is all that really matters.

When we seek balance in how much we do and we weigh our opportunity cost (the gain that we receive when distributing our time and/or money), we learn to live by doing “just enough”. Doing just enough isn’t being lazy; it is being calculating and efficient. On the other hand, doing less than our potential is being lazy. Don’t confuse doing “just enough” with the latter.

Next time you go out to dine, and we are asked to supersize this or jumbo size that, think about what it means to have just enough — we might just decide to go for (half) of the dessert, and skip everything else.

If this post has inspired you, please leave a comment. What could you be doing “just enough”?

I put my carry-on in the luggage compartment and sat down in my assigned seat. It was going to be a long flight. ‘I’m glad I have a good book to read. Perhaps I will get a short nap,’ I thought.
Just before take- off, a line of soldiers came down the aisle and filled all the vacant seats, totally surrounding me. I decided to start a conversation.
‘Where are you headed?’ I asked the soldier seated nearest to me.
‘Petawawa. We’ll be there for two weeks for special training, and then we’re being deployed to Afghanistan
After flying for about an hour, an announcement was made that sack lunches were available for five dollars. It would be several hours before we reached the east, and I quickly decided a lunch would help pass the time…
As I reached for my wallet, I overheard a soldier ask his buddy if he planned to buy lunch. ‘No, that seems like a lot of money for just a sack lunch. Probably wouldn’t be worth five bucks. I’ll wait till we get to base.’
His friend agreed.
I looked around at the other soldiers. None were buying lunch. I walked to the back of the plane and handed the flight attendant a fifty dollar bill. ‘Take a lunch to all those soldiers.’ She grabbed my arms and squeezed tightly. Her eyes wet with tears, she thanked me. ‘My son was a soldier in  Iraq  ; it’s almost like you are doing it for him.’
Picking up ten sacks, she headed up the aisle to where the soldiers were seated. She stopped at my seat and asked, ‘Which do you like best – beef or chicken?’
‘Chicken,’ I replied, wondering why she asked. She turned and went to the front of plane, returning a minute later with a dinner plate from first class.
‘This is your thanks..’
After we finished eating, I went again to the back of the plane, heading for the rest room.
A man stopped me. ‘I saw what you did. I want to be part of it. Here, take this.’ He handed me twenty-five dollars.
Soon after I returned to my seat, I saw the Flight Captain coming down the aisle, looking at the aisle numbers as he walked, I hoped he was not looking for me, but noticed he was looking at the numbers only on my side of the plane. When he got to my row he stopped, smiled, held out his hand and said, ‘I want to shake your hand.’ Quickly unfastening my seatbelt I stood and took the Captain’s hand. With a booming voice he said, ‘I was a soldier and I was a military pilot. Once, someone bought me a lunch. It was an act of kindness I never forgot.’ I was embarrassed when applause was heard from all of the passengers.
Later I walked to the front of the plane so I could stretch my legs. A man who was seated about six rows in front of me reached out his hand, wanting to shake mine. He left another twenty-five dollars in my palm.
When we landed I gathered my belongings and started to deplane. Waiting just inside the airplane door was a man who stopped me, put something in my shirt pocket, turned, and walked away without saying a word. Another twenty-five dollars!
Upon entering the terminal, I saw the soldiers gathering for their trip to the base.
I walked over to them and handed them seventy-five dollars. ‘It will take you some time to reach the base.. It will be about time for a sandwich.
God Bless You.’
Ten young men left that flight feeling the love and respect of their fellow travelers.
As I walked briskly to my car, I whispered a prayer for their safe return. These soldiers were giving their all for our country. I could only give them a couple of meals. It seemed so little…
A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to ‘The  United States of America  ‘ for an amount of ‘up to and including my life.’
That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.’
May God give you the strength and courage to pass this along to everyone on your email buddy list….
I JUST DID
Let us pray…
Prayer chain for our Military… Don’t break it!
Please send this on after a short prayer.. Prayer for our soldiers Don’t break it!
Prayer:
‘Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. Amen.’
Prayer Request: When you receive this, please stop for a moment and say a prayer for our troops around the world.
There is nothing attached. Just send this to people in your address book. Do not let it stop with you. Of all the gifts you could give a Marine, Soldier, Sailor, Airman, & others deployed in harm’s way, prayer is the very best one.
GOD BLESS YOU FOR PASSING IT ON!

Later in life, I realize that this cycle is part of life. You as parents will compare your kids. Parents subconsciously do this as a motivation tool for their children. We are competitive because we are constantly compared with others. If we are told that we are perfect, we become content believing that we are good enough (or worse, better than everyone else). It may seem odd, but comparing you with others who may seemingly be better than you is a way to help you achieve your inner potential. Don’t get stressed when your parents or others compare you. It is a parent’s funny way of telling you that you have great potential and they are encouraging you to reach for them.

Someday your parents will leave this world and you will no longer hear them compare you except in your memories. That day, you will thank them for encouraging (i.e., comparing) you to become who you are today and who you will become in the future. A lot of things in life doesn’t make sense when you are young, but you will discover why things work the way they do as you mature. If you are still a kid, enjoy your moment and don’t let things like being compared stress you out. Take it for what it is – “an encouragement to help you reach your inner potential”.

If this post has inspired you, you may also enjoy reading my other post, What Defines Greatness.

Imagine yourself an off roader. You are adventurous going where ever your owner decides to take you. You go through rivers, up rugged hills, drive on the sand, mud and snow. You get to watch the waterfalls inside tropical rain forests and magma erupt in the Volcanoes high up. When you were new, you are tough and life is exciting. As you age and the rugged life takes its toll, your parts wear and become expensive to replace. You cannot go to the same places that life once took you. You look back and reminisce about the exciting days when you were young and tough.

Imagine yourself a clunker. Your parts are fragile and you are always breaking down. Your owner don’t want to spend money on you because he wants to move on to something better and new. You get to go places but occasionally you break down in the middle of the road. You are neglected and eventually end up in the stock pile.

Imagine yourself a regular old car. You are driven to work and back every day. You are washed and your oil is regularly changed. On occasion you are taken to visit places and get to experience life. However, you spend most of your days parked at work, and return home in the evening. Life is steady.

Imagine yourself a fast sports car. You go from zero to sixty in 2 seconds and get to experience life in the fast lane. Everything is about speed and you can’t stand driving next to the slow cars on the road. Your gas and parts are expensive and soon you must retire because you become too expensive to drive. Life is short and you sit in the garage most days as your owner drives something a little more practical.

Imagine yourself a well engineered cruiser. You can drive distances non-stop seeing the world from end to end. You are taken to so many places that you experience the world ten times over. Just before the evening, you watch the sun set and in the morning you watch the sun rise. You are dependable and well tuned. Eventually you run out of miles and only driven on occasion. You sit parked in the garage reminiscing about all the places that you have been. You got to live life as a car should.

If this post has inspired you, please leave a comment. Which car do you want to live your life?

If you liked this post, you may also enjoy reading my other post, If You Could Live Forever, What Would You Value the Most.

In the story of Johnny Appleseed, he walked the country with bags and bags of apple seeds and planted them where ever he went. Most seeds never bear fruit, but he planted so many of them, in so many places that in time, there were apple trees sprouting everywhere. Sadly, most of these trees died before it bears a single apple, but those that survived provided apples. For the lucky towns where the apple trees bear fruit, the towns’ people planted more apple trees in their own fields. Travelers who passed by these towns ate these apples and brought them to the next town. So many people enjoyed these apples that a farmer decided that he could make a business planting more apple trees and selling the apples everywhere. Johnny did not have to nurture each seed he planted. He just planted a lot of them in as many places as he could, and hoping that it will miraculously grow everywhere.

Then there is the lost story of Jennie Appleseed. Jennie was an avid traveler of the seas. She landed on a particular tropical island and came upon a fruit high up in the mountains that had a shape somewhat like an apple. It was a funny looking apple but when she took a bite, it was the most delicious fruit she had ever tasted. She plucked as many of these apples as she could carry and ventured back to her home country by ship. By the time she sailed back home, all of these apples had rotted. She took the seeds from these apples and planted them in her fields. No trees sprouted. She took all the seeds she could and traveled across the distant land and planted the seeds in as many different kinds of soil as she could. Surely she thought that one of these trees would sprout the delicious apples that she had once tasted. Till the day of her death, none of her seeds became a fruit bearing tree.

Generations later, Jennie’s granddaughter, Sarah came upon these same apples that her grandmother ate while hiking high up in the mountain on a tropical island. Learning from her grandmother’s mistake, Sarah decided to stay in this tropical island. She made a home in the mountains and planted fields of these apples using only seeds from sweat apples. She carefully observed the places where the apples grew sweater and more abundant. She watered and soiled her fields just like the places that grew the sweetest apples. In time, she grew fields of these delicious apples. Sarah shipped these apples back home, and her townspeople loved it so much that they wanted more. In time, everyone wanted these special apples – and they were willing to pay a premium so that they can send them as special gifts to friends and family to taste. As time passed, everyone refer to these apples as “Sarah” apples. Sarah turned this island into a tropical haven and people from everywhere came to visit, and they got to enjoy lots of delicious “Sarah” apples.

There are many of us like Johnny and Jenny Appleseed. We walk through life planting as many seeds as we can, where ever we can, hoping that if we plant enough of them, they will someday turn into fruit bearing trees; and giving us delicious apples. We take this approach when finding happiness, love, jobs, business opportunities and other aspects of life. If we are lucky, our seeds may bear fruit, and perhaps, a lot of fruit. Most however, won’t bear any fruit and will not sprout any trees. Most that do bear fruit will likely bear sour apples that we end up spitting out.

On the other approach, some of us will learn the lessons as Sarah had learned. Rather than wasting our effort in planting seeds everywhere, we choose to be selective of the seeds that we plant and the fields where we plant them. We will nurture our seeds, water them and keep pests from harming them as it grows. It requires patience and a lot of care, but when the tree produces the sweetest apple that one has ever tasted, you realize that it was well worth its weight in gold.

Selectively plant your seeds, and spend the time to nurture its growth. These will be the sweetest apples that you have ever tasted. This is true in your pursuit of happiness, love, friends, careers, business opportunities and most aspects of life. When you plant your seeds in the right places and spend the time to nurture its growth, you will find yourself a happier person. Don’t just network with as many random people as you can and not develop meaningful relationships. Don’t go on a dating marathon hoping you will find love when you don’t spend the time or make the effort to notice what might be in front of you. Don’t go into a business that you know you will hate. If you want sweet apples (and not sour ones), don’t just plant your seeds anywhere. You will need to stay and nurture them. Read my other post on Finding Joy in Creating Happiness.

If this post has inspired you, please leave a comment. Are you one who plant seeds or do you nurture growth?

Many people are so caught up with the day to day business of life that they forget that life is also like playing a game –- no pun intended (there is actually a game called, Life). Why do we play a game — well, to have fun! Don’t treat life too seriously; it’s okay to have fun (really).

Some might ask, why do I find joy in making others happy. Think about times when you were happiest. Wasn’t the company (friends, family or a loved one) you were with happy as well? If they weren’t happy, could you truly be happy? If you believe you could, then perhaps you are not being honest with yourself. If the company you are with is not happy, then you could not have been completely happy. So isn’t it worth expending the effort to help make those around you happy? Is it considered self-fish to seek happiness this way? No, because being self-fish is focused on ME. Making others happy is focused on OTHERS but also ME.

When we can create happiness in the life of others, it makes life fun . Now imagine when we have inspired others to also find joy in creating happiness for others. What a beautiful future that would be… A Beautiful Future

If this post has inspired you, please leave a comment. What joy do you find in creating happiness?

Imagine if you will, that you were immortal just like the Gods and Goddesses in Greek mythology. You never age and can never die. What would you value most? For me, it is “time”. When we were young, we couldn’t wait to get old. When we are old, we wish we were still young. With money and food, sometimes you have less, other times you have more. With time, once it has passed, it is gone forever. You can never get it back. So I ponder, why do so many of us waste “time”? We have enough food, water and air to last many lifetimes, but our time is finite and we know it will end; whether tomorrow or many years from tomorrow.

When we are children, we play and dream to our hearts content. We don’t have a care in the world, except to fulfill our own happiness. We don’t see the point of studying and doing homework, because that is something for a distant future that is so far away. As we grow older, life teaches us responsibilities. We must think about what to do with our future.

Some will prefer to remain a young child and ignore the responsibilities of life. We live in the moment and could care less about tomorrow. Unfortunately for these people, they will hate life because they can never get away from responsibilities.

Others would rather believe that they have an abundant amount of time. We feel that it can be wasted because it is ours to waste. We believe that time is so abundant that the future can be ignored till tomorrow or the day after tomorrow or the year after tomorrow or a decade after tomorrow. These people will realize that the future came and past.

Some will accept responsibilities but will find little enjoyment and reward in life. We work and go on living as our parents had done with no other purpose than to provide offspring to continue our generation forward. We are no different than insects and animals depending on mere instincts to survive; simply to spread our seeds and extend our family line.

There are also those who wants to simply buck the system and choose not to be remembered. We lack hope in the future and would rather pass through life unnoticed. These people will die lonely and regretful.

The few will take on the future. We will achieve great things, inspire others and live life as if any day could be our last (read my post on How To Inspire Others). We realize that NOT money, fame, food, water or even air is our most valuable resource in life; but it is our “time” that cannot be wasted. We will dream, but dreaming and not believing is short lived. Dreaming but not doing is simply a waste of our time. We will plan, do, and yes, sometimes we will fail. Each time we fail, we will learn from our mistakes; and fail again if we must. The most important thing is that we keep on trying (read my post on Realizing Your Vision).

If I could live forever, what would I do different? I would waste less time. Make your time count.

If you were inspired by this post, please leave a comment. What would you value most?